Thursday 31 October 2013

Black, White or Grey Areas

Hello Loviessss,

How have you all been? Sorry for the really long break from blogging. 
It all started first with me feeling a little overwhelmed with different aspects of my life then i think i got to the point where i worried my pretty not so little head into actually falling ill.
Lately I have been pondering on lots of things, and have been in that phase where a lot of 20 somethings & maybe 30 somethings find themselves. You know that phase where you ask yourself - are things really just simply Black or White or are there grey areas?

As i approach the next phase my life where i know its decision making time, i have to stop, breath and be clear about my next step; knowing full well that my next step might be the defining factor of the next 5 years or decade of my  life. I am also aware of the subtle pressure of making or staying in the 'right' career choice, having meaningful relationships, staying fit, eating right, developing myself, following my passion or career etc.

In my pursuit of black, white or grey areas, i have decided to compartmentalize my life into 7 major parts: Spirituality, Family, relationships, Career & finances, health & spare time/freedom.

Spirituality: One of my favorite scriptures from the bible is in the book of Prov 3:5 & 6 - Trust the Lord with all your heart; lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths. 
You have to consciously/intentionally live a life of purpose. What are you here on earth for? This question can only be answered if you step back and evaluate your relationship with God. He is the only one who can help you answer that question & fill that void/emptiness we sometimes feel even when we have the most amazing jobs, romantic guy or lives. I took some timeout to do some Soul cleansing lately and i realized that in my pursuit of black, white or grey areas in life, i had actually almost left the Lord behind, almost forgotten to make Him the centre of it all. Thankfully, He was waiting for me with open arms to fulfill the above scripture in my life. 

Family: I have an amazing family and they have been my support system. My sisters are the bestestttttt in the world and my brother is just God's gift to us. Since our parents passed away, we have always been there for each other. Don't know what my life would have been without them. 

Relationships: Trust me, I am not the best person to speak about this aspect of life because i have had my own fair share just like any girl my age but one thing i have learnt is You have to learn to complete YOU before someone else can. You have to learn to be happy & joyful by yourself before you let someone else in. Its important i mention that when i talk about relationships here, i am also referring to friendships. As i get older, i realize the importance of true friendship; and also realize it isn't about seeing each other daily, its about accepting each other, managing your expectations, being loyal and just being a TRUE FRIEND. I really wish i could define who this true friend is but the honest truth is as we get older, we know when we've found one.

Career/Finance: I guess i am at that point where i have to ask myself some very serious questions regarding my career. I am a Learning & Development Consultant in Human Resources but my passion is fashion. I have actually gone ahead to invest in my passion. The question however is do i go with my passion or do i go with a career that pays the bills? (Common Sense right?)I actually enjoy my job because i can do it for free however i feel my passion is suffering because of my career ( I have decided to ask myself a few questions and i hope this helps anyone who is in my shoes.

- What is your Passion?
- Is your passion profitable & is there a demand for it?
- How much are you willing to invest in your passion? E.g Courses you can attend.
- Can your passion driven career be done on the side with your bill paying career?
-  Can you sustain a living from your passion or would you have to have a lifestyle cut? 
- Is the market for your passion saturated?
- What would be your niche?
- Have you researched to see how you'll make a differential factor in the industry & stand out?
- Who are your motivators? Mine is Sarah Blakey, the lady who started SPANX.
- What are you willing to sacrifice to achieve this goal?
- If your passion cannot be done on the side with your career, have you made a decision to follow your passion? (This is usually very hard).
-Most importantly, have you set a timeline to save up & plan for your passion? (As much as i hate excel spreadsheet, i have realized its been my true friend this season).

When you are able to answer these questions honestly, i think things would be clearer. 

Regarding finances, remember to save as much as you can. Savings could be in form of investment, a business or actual money in the bank. 
I always say to my self "Live in the best house after you have saved, wear the best clothes after you have saved, ride in the best cars after you have saved". And i am by no means saying you shouldn't indulge, or be an aka gum to yourself, all i am saying is we must learn to be disciplined financially as we get older. Preaching to MYSELF TOO :-D
I am also learning to apply the Walk-Away Law: This law states that you walk away from certain wants even when you can afford them. (Am i being too hard on myself? thinking). E.g, that dress that you already own in a similar cut but in black & you just saw the mustard & you know you 'must' get it...ermmm the choice is yours.
I am also learning that internet shopping in Nigeria is fast rising & it isn't bad at all. 

Health/Staying Fit: Being fit isn't a trend, its a way of life. But i'll start by saying you must love who you are before going on this journey. I have never been a fan of any diet, (Diets actually irritate me) but recently, in my pursuit of black, white or grey areas, i decided to try a detox program of just fruits & and i told my power puff girls about it but trust me, i didn't last 4 days...LOL. Sometimes sef, seeing bloggers with their perfect bodies and clothes add to the pressure...LOL. Anyways working out isn't easy, but it works for me so i go to the gym 2-3 times a week as work permits. I also realized jogging is therapeutic for me, it helps me clear my head. I personally eat whatever i want, from healthy salads - cake & ice cream but portion control is my watch word. So if you are out there wondering where to start from, it might be a dance class or just walking or cutting down on your portion or carbs here and there, JUST DO IT.

Spare Time: This is one part i need to take seriously. I realized when i started my career that i am actually a workaholic and i can go on and on without a proper Vacay. Well all that has to stop because i have decided that i would live my life. I plan to go on more trips to exotic locations, not the usual places the average Nigerian loves to visit...LOL. "the innit & you know wa i'm saying places"...LOL. 
I have also decided to enjoy the little things in life. Plan day dates & date nights with friends, because when he 'puts the ring on it' and the kids start coming, it gets a lot more difficult to do these things. Have a quiet time at the beach with your loved one or just read a nice book.

Please, abeg i need to stop here, i am so sleepy. I don't know who made me Steve Harvey, Fela Durotoye and more recently Omotola J Ekeinde...hehehe.

This post is just from a girl like you, on a journey to finding the Black, white or grey areas of life.
I welcome more contributions, comments, what you think & how you deal with the different compartments i mentioned above.

In other news, i realized i am probably the only fashion blogger who hasn't done an outfit post in the Black & White trend. Oh well, here we are, hope you like?

Also i need to say a little something about hair; I noticed there has been some subtle divide in the hair world. Team Natural & Team Relaxed. Phewwww. I know some natural hair bloggers who would take it as far as not commenting on your blog if you are supposed to be natural & you wear a weave... like seriously?
Hair is never that serious ladies...LOL. Natural hair isn't a movement. I read some hair blogs and i see scary stuff about how relaxed hair or wearing a weave makes you a slave  etc... Haba people calm down, life is too short not to look pweety whether natural or relaxed. The most important thing is having healthy hair & loving your hair. 

Finally, live your life and don't compare yourself with normal middle class people like you that social media has given celebrity lifestyles...LOL.

Thanks for always reading my lovies.


Some Quotes:Kimberlyluxe

Saturday 19 October 2013

PowerPuff Girls

Hello Loviesssss,

I am not sure i have ever blogged on a saturday...hmm... thinking.

Anyways this time last week saturday, i was excited about meeting two of my blog sisters for the first time. Well i ran into Berry once at the supermarket and we almost screamed the place down. There's just something about the blog world that makes you feel close to certain people even if you haven't met them. 

So I met with Bex of bexluv2dress who also just started her amazing food blog bexcoox and Berry of berrydakara and oh my it was way too much fun. 
We met at the Indian Restaurant Spice Route; in Victoria Island and we gisted like old friends who had been apart for a while and were just catching up. We talked about EVERYTHING you can imagine. 

I remember telling SL about the meet up and when i mentioned all our names BERRY, BEX & STYLEFASH, he said our names sounded like PowerPuff girls...LOL.

We are planning another one soon, something really girly this time, watch this space. 

Thanks for always reading lovies.

Warning: Picture Overload...Hehehe


Quote of the Day: I don't know if i've ever been in a clique but the older i've gotten, the more i've realized what friendship really is - Aimee Teegarden

 Bex arrived first, love her pretty ring

 Starters - Please don't ask me the name, i just know its some Veggie wrap

 Berry joined us a few minutes later. Love her gorgeous earrings

 Placing our order and initial goofing around.

 What we ordered - Briani, Steamed Rice, Seafood Curry, Chicken Vindaloo & some Nan

 Berry's Plate

 Bex's Plate

 My Plate

 The Buddha Statue

 Gisting and gisting about EVERYTHING

 Berry & Bex

 Bex being protected by the Buddha guards

 The really cool table with different spices... Love it so much

4hrs and a few glasses of red wine later...LOL, goofing around in the elevator on our way home. I actually wish i was in this shot. I know you'll kill me Bex & Berry but this has got to be my favorite shot...Hahhaha.

Sunday 13 October 2013

Something borrowed and never to be returned

Hello Loviessss,

Hope you all had a fabulous weekend? 

My saturday was really fun, met up with two of my blog sisters and we had an amazing time. The gist and all the fun we had would definitely be posted as soon as i get all the pictures.

Anyone who knows me well knows i don't joke with my public holiday so I am so looking forward to tuesday & wednesday. Don't have much planned yet but i am sure something interesting would come up as always.

I wore this outfit to work a few fridays ago and had my fro out. I remember stealing borrowing this gorgeous blazer from my kid sister fadekemi, it felt so good. I tell people that one of the best relationships a girl would ever have is the older/ younger sister relationship. One of the most annoying things however is for the said younger sister to wear same dress or shoe size with her older sister. I am certain you have all experienced opening your wardrobe and realizing that your favorite top, pair of jeans, shoes or accessories are gone.  I know there is love in sharing, but trust me there's always this outfit or pair of shoes you have marked no go area but guess what, they still go there; i think just to get on your last nerve... Lol. I envy those who have younger brothers or siblings who don't wear same size...hehehe. We still love them to bits regardless of this naughty behavior.

That was me just venting...hehehe. Well this stolen blazer goes out to all big sisters for all the dresses, shoes and accessories taken without your permission. *One Love*

Please share your experiences about your younger or older siblings taking your things without your permission or if you are the culprit sibling...LOL. 

Thanks for always reading lovies.


Tuesday 8 October 2013

Something Fishy

Hello loviessss,

How have you all been? So between my horrible internet connection and having severe neck pain since sunday night, i haven't been able to blog. Please bear with me.

Meanwhile, have you ever owned an outfit or accessory you can literarily wear with anything? any color, any style of top, dressed up or down? An outfit you can rock repeatedly, almost back to back without giving a flying horse? I call them genie pieces and my MaxMara print pencil skirt is definitely one of such. The fishy print is so pretty and the colors just light up my day.

I have worn the skirt so much in the past few weeks that as they say, in its next life it wouldn't come anywhere near my doorstep...hehe.

Top: NYC, Skirt: MaxMara, Neckpiece: Macys, Wrist
Watch: MK, Bag: Moschino, Shoes: Old. 
Fendi Perfume box used as one of my accessory boxes :-D

I wore my first outfit two sundays ago to a church i was invited to. I paired the lovely print skirt with a white top and aqua/green accessories. 

I decided to wear the same skirt last sunday to my church with a mustard dress worn as top. I think both looks rocked.

Which of the looks do you prefer? I was going to pair the second look with red shoes but i completely forgot and rocked same shoes and belt. Oh well :-D

LD found this lovely cafe where they make some of the best salads around. Just call, order and they'll deliver to your home or office.

Went for dinner at the Sky Lounge Eko Hotel & Suites with some friends and had this delicious dessert. It was really nice. Forgot to take more pictures.

Please don't forget to nominaate me for the Personal Fashion & Style category 9. Just click the link for the NBA on the top right of the blog.

Thanks for always reading my lovies. Stay Chic.


Tuesday 1 October 2013

Proudly Nigerian

Hello Loviessss,

Happy Independence Nigeria; We are 53 years today...Yipee. 

So i woke up today at 6am and i rejected the devil and every spirit of waking up early or work mode work ko, work ni. I just covered myself and went deeper under my duvet and switched my sleep gear to another level. I finally woke up about 11am and went to get my bowl of cereal, turned on my TV only to realize i had forgotten to renew my DSTV subscription :(  I was so looking forward to watching  Come Dine with me, Keeping up appearances, Big bang theory, Anger management etc. I had to turn to my bootleg dvd's i bought a while ago from the guy opposite the Palms shopping mall. That guy is just a life saver. 

Anyways, I promised not to write a lot of long stories about Nigeria, i would just continue to pray and thank God that our land is still green and things would surely get better.  
One thing i know is i am PROUDLY NIGERIAN.

For my outfit, i had this old Topshop T-shirt i designed with rhinestones a while ago and i paired it with my black pencil skirt, metal toe cap pumps, tiny green belt and mustard envelope purse. 

Now to my confession; immediately after my dear neighbor took this picture, i went back into my apartment, undressed, slipped into my joggers and tee and went back too bed...hehehe.

I guess i just remembered Lamina & Eniola's threats about sending militants to kidnap me if i don't keep up with my blog job...hahaha. 

Thanks for always reading lovies. 

Please don't forget to vote for me.


Nigerian Iron Man